Released

So, it is official, I was released on Sunday from my calling as the primary president of our ward. I was dreading this day for a long time because I have truly loved my calling. I love the kids in our ward and will miss being with them each week. They are awesome kids...ALL of them! It has been a huge emotional roller coaster the past week and I am still trying to recover. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am VERY sentimental, attached, etc. I am awful at change and horrible at endings and good-byes. So, this release has pretty much tapped into everything I struggle with. I was just hoping I could be like the General Authorities and stay in until I die. But, alas, that isn't how it works. I was really confused because a lot of friends and people in the ward etc. have made the comment that I must be really "relieved" or "excited" about the break. I kind of look at them like they are a little crazy. But Rob really put it into perspective last night. I was telling him how odd I thought it was the people thought I would be relieved. He assured me that it wasn't the other people who were odd, but it was me. What? He explained that most people after serving for over 2 years with a primary of close to 200 children and pouring everything into it, WOULD be relieved and happy to finally have a break. He pointed out that I am very much the exception to the rule. I guess he is right. I guess most people might be relieved. I kind of wish I was, then it wouldn't be so difficult. In addition, of course, it doesn't help that I am pregnant, have been so sick every day, etc. which has already put my emotions very close to the surface. I did a lot of crying this past week, mostly in private. After the bishopric left our home after releasing me, I told Rob I was going upstairs to go to the bathroom. My sweet husband, who knows me all to well said, "Are you just going to go up there and cry? I know you are. Please don't." He was right, but I'm a girl and I have to get these thigns out of my system. Rob, in typical fashion, has been incredibly understanding, supportive, loving, and kind. He has let me vent, he has let me cry on his shoulder, and he has listened and listened and listened to the rantings of an emotional wife. He deserves a prize. So, that is the update there. I know I will move on. I know I will have other things to do in the church. But I will never ever forget the wonderful times I have had in this primary. I have learned more with the children of this ward, then any adult classes I have been in. I will miss the true and pure spirit in primary. I will miss the hugs and the smiles and the hilarious comments from the kids. I will miss the music so much. That is one of my favorite parts. I am eternally grateful for this opportunity I have had and I hope that the Lord is pleased with what I have done.