Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Tomorrow's the big day

I should be doing laundry, packing for the hospital, cleaning, etc. because tomorrow is the big day. Our little guy will be coming into the world. It seems like I have been pregnant forever, and yet somehow, this day has crept up on us! In my defense, he isn't due until July 15. So I thought we may have 2 more weeks. Then, a week ago, my OB scheduled me for a non-medical induction on July 8. So I thought I had 1 more week. Then, out of the blue, I puffed up and my blood pressure has continued to rise, so I found out on Monday that our little man will be here tomorrow. EEEK!

It is amazing the difference between your first baby and your fifth. I was thinking back to the day before Cayden was born. He was also induced so we knew we were going in. The day before, I had butterflies, I couldn't sleep, I was frantic trying to make sure everything was ready, etc. Fast forward 9 years to baby #5 and I'm surprisingly calm. Kind of eerily calm. We still haven't 100% decided on a name. I'm not packed for the hospital. I have a pile of laundry that needs to be done. And the house could use some tidying up. But I am not frantic or crazy. Things all have a way of working themselves out, right? I realized tonight that being a mother of almost 5 has forced me to just roll with the punches. I have thoroughly surrendered to the philosophy, "Come what may and love it". (Okay, I can't say that I always love it...or even like it, but it is still going to come, so may as well deal with it.) It's amazing how we change over the years.

I am truly grateful for my 4 amazing children. As I watched them play together today, I again realized how special and magnificant they are! I am blessed beyond words to have such wonderful children. They are over-the-moon excited for their new baby brother to be born tomorrow. We even made a "birthday cake" tonight to celebrate. They can't wait and love him so much already. I am also forever and eternally grateful for my wonderful Rob who is the best partner I could ask for. We are a great team and have always relied on each other through everything. It is fun to see his excitement for a new baby tomorrow. I'm sure some of that excitement has to be because he is getting another boy!

So, wish us luck tomorrow. We'll keep the blog updated and post any news as it happens!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

A long past due update

Holy cow it has been so long since I blogged. I would love to say that is because I was on a long exotic vacation or was doing something so exciting that I just couldn't blog. But that simply would not be true.

Since I last blogged many many things have happened so I am going to do a quick update. I'll try to post pictures later.
-Dance Recital Part 2 - As I wrote in an earlier post, the girls' dance recital got completely rained out. It was a completely nightmare. It was rescheduled for a week later. Unfortunately, the clouds starting looming that afternoon and about an hour before the recital was to start, we were in the middle of another typhoon! We waited in the car and little by little, the rain let up and we were able to do the recital. It was a little soggy and wet, but nothing we couldn't handle. I was again SO proud of my girls and their dance. They knew the steps and even though there were only 5 of them to perform, they did great! We were happy to have made it through the recital!
-Swim Lessons - Summer in our family means that it is time for swim lessons. We have done swim lessons at the West Jordan pool for the past 3 years. The kids love it, the teachers are great, and it is a great way to get the kids their exercise, wear them out, kill some time, and help them learn. This year proved a challenge though because Sadie is now very mobile and loves the water. She is too young for official lessons and because I am super pregnant, I was dreading chasing her around each day while the kids were in the pool. The first day of swim lessons, I was ready to fall over from exhaustion from chasing her. Then I realized there was a "Mommy and me" class at the same time as the other kids' lessons. For the record, if you would have told me that I would be getting in a public pool at 8 months pregnant on a daily basis, I would have told you that you were nuts. But it is amazing what you will do for some sanity and for your kids. So, on day 2 of swim lessons, there I was in my maternity swim suit (very hot!) with Sadie in tow. I have to say that a lot of my "courage" came from another mom, who's daughter is in Cayden's school class. She was just as preggo as me and not self conscious at all about being in the pool. I am so grateful to her for her example. We got in the pool and it felt SO good to me! It took so much of the weight off of my back from my ever growing belly and I was so grateful that I decided to do it. Since then, Sadie and I have been swim partners and loving every day. Sadie is getting more and more comfortable in the water and now stands on the side and says "Ready...set...go" and then jumps in. It has actually worked out great all around.
-The N1H1 virus aka "swine flu" - So my kids got out of school on a Friday. I was really gearing up for grand plans of what we were going to do together. I knew it was going to be difficult because I was growing more preggo every day, but I still was determined to have fun with the kids and make it a fun summer break. Fast forward to the following Monday. I started feeling a little under the weather. Like the early stages of a cold. I didn't think much of it. By Wednesday, I had completely lost my voice, had a horrible cough, cold, and body aches. I could hardly move I was so sick. I called Rob at work to have him come home early and I curled up on the couch until he came home to rescue me. I called my OB to find out what I should do. He was out of the office for the week, so I talked to an on call nurse. She told me in no uncertain terms that it sounded like I had swine flu. I was somewhat shocked at that diagnosis and immediately concerned. I asked if I should get tested and she told me it wouldn't matter because there wasn't anything they could do for me because I was pregnant. So, I hunkered down and tried to "will" myself better. I can honestly say that I do not remember a time that I have been so sick. My chest hurt, I was in pain, I couldn't sleep, etc. and I was worried about my unborn baby boy and the toll this was taking on him. My wonderful knight in shining armor, Rob, was a saint. He took work off to be with the kids, held down the fort, and took care of me. He was so sweet and caring and I couldn't have done it without him. By Saturday, I was having problems breathing and my heart was racing. I was about to go to the ER when I realized that I hadn't asked for a Priesthood Blessing. My sweet dad came up within hours and he and Rob gave me a beautiful blessing. I was reassured that I would be okay as would the baby. I was feeling quite a bit better by that evening. My ward caught wind of what was going on and within a matter of a few minutes of a sign up sheet going around Relief Society, we had meals for the whole week coming in. I have never been so grateful for this service! On Monday, I called my regular doctor just to see what he thought. He had me come right in. I tested negative for swine flu, but he told me that the test was only about 70% accurate and he felt that I should be treated for it anyway. When I told him what the OB nurse had said, he looked at me like I was nuts. He informed me that I was actually considered "high risk" and should have been put on anti-viral medication immediately. It made me so grateful that I was being watched over and that nothing more serious had happened to me or the baby. I started Tami-flu that day and started feeling better. I am amazed that even though the actual symptoms have been long gone, I am still struggling to get my strength back from this illness. I am more than ready to be back to "normal".
-Happy 13th Anniversary - I was smack in the middle of my flu epidemic when our 13 year anniversary hit. Not that it would have mattered much. Rob and I made a decision a few months ago, after a pretty pathetic Valentines, that all other holidays until the baby is born don't count. We will celebrate them after the baby is born. So far we have Mother's Day, Father's Day, our anniversary, and Rob's birthday all chalked up.
-"The Horse Party" - Every year for the past few years, Rob's sister, Lori, has hosted a family party at their little farm in Hooper. They have 2 horses as well as a few other animals. My kids LOVE this party. They saddle up the horses and let the kids ride as much as they want. For my kids, it is heaven! Unfortunately, this year, the weather wasn't cooperating so they didn't get to ride at all. They did get to feed the horses and play and have a yummy BBQ. We will head back to Hooper on another sunnier day to ride.
-The appearance of the Stay Puffed Marshmallow Woman-I have been relatively un-swollen this pregnancy. My feet hadn't turned into "biscuits", I hadn't gained a ton of water weight etc. like in my past pregnancies. I thought I was doing okay. Then, out of the blue, I puffed up like the Stay Puffed Marshmallow Man - all in one day! It happened to be Father's Day and by that night, my feet no longer fit in my flip flops, I was miserable, and everything seemed swollen. It didn't help that while at my parents' home for Father' Day, Sadie followed me out in the front yard and went running towards the road. I was the only one out front with her so I had to actually run up the long driveway to catch her before she reached the very busy Redwood Road. I don't think I will ever be the same.
-Father's Day - I had grand plans to do a wonderful and beautiful post about my fantastic husband who is the best dad around. It was going to be elaborate and sentimental and sappy. Yeah, didn't happen. Suffice it to say, we had a nice Father's Day. I made him yummy crepes and bacon for brunch, the kids sang to him in church, he got to take a long nap, and I made him one of his favorite Sunday meals - chicken enchiladas. He got some new clothes, some of his favorite treats, and a cheesecake. The girls made him cards in primary. He said it was a great Father's Day. I hope so.
-OB Appointment - toxemia alert - After my swelling up weekend, I guess I shouldn't have been surprised at my OB appointment a few days later to find that I was experiencing some of the early signs of toxemia. My blood pressure had gone up considerably to 140/88. I was still swollen and retaining water. And I had gained 5 lbs in one week...all water. This put me on the "toxemia border". I had toxemia with Cayden and the twins and was induced early with all of them. But Sadie broke the mold and I was perfectly fine with her. Not a sign of toxemia. Apparently, she will be my only baby that I don't have toxemia with because from all indications I am on the road to another induction.
-A house of order...almost - With the looming possibility of an early induction, it put me into full blown "nesting" mode. The good news is that because Sadie is still so young, only 22 months, we still have most of our baby stuff out and set up. This past Friday, my sweet mom came up to help me out. Getting a bad case of the N1H1 flu a few weeks before delivering a new baby plus kids home for summer vacation can make for a VERY messy house, a lot of clutter, and PLENTY of laundry. I was so appreciative of my mom coming and helping me out. We made quite a dent in things, including all of the laundry. I was exhausted by the end of it, but it was worth it to have it done. We even got the changing table organized, stocked, and ready for a new baby. On Saturday, I continued the organizing process by getting the baby's clothes organized, making room in Sadie's closet to now share with her new brother, etc. It was so nice to have done. There is still a lot to do, but I am not going to stress about it. It will come in time.

Friday, June 5, 2009

My poor children..the last day of school

Some Teacher gifts I did

The things we inherit from our parents are so interesting. Some of the positives that I inherited from my parents are my dad's good hair, my mom's cooking (almost), my dad's love to garden and be outside, and my mom's tenacity, etc. The negatives that I inherited are my mom's varicose veins, my dad's horrible teeth, my mom's struggle with change, my dad's joints, etc.

It is interesting to see what things my kids inherit from me and Rob. They are pretty much sunk when it comes to any hope of having good teeth. I think they are pretty darn smart. They love the outdoors. And each of them has individual things that they have inherited from us.

Unfortunately, I discovered yesterday, that they all have inherited my total and complete sappiness, sentimentality, and loathing for endings and change.

Yesterday was the last day of school. Most kids are jumping for joy and counting down the hours for this blessed day. My kids have been excited, but on the actual day, reality hits. I picked them up from school yesterday, they gave their teachers the gifts we had done, said their goodbyes and we headed home. We weren't home for more than a few hours when it began. First it was Cayden. He went up to his room and when I walked by, I could hear him crying. I went and asked what was wrong, and he was just so distraught because he was going to miss his teacher so much. I had to give him full credit on this one because his teacher, Miss Anderson, has been stellar! She is one of those special teachers that you just never want to leave. It broke my heart that he was so sad and so upset. This lasted pretty much all through the night. He is at that stage where he is a big kid, 9 years old, so he doesn't want to cry, but sometimes can't hold it back. McKell had her moments of sadness at the thoughts of leaving 1st grade and her teacher, Mrs Stoll. Another great teacher. Apparently, she didn't even wait until we got home, she was teary eyed and sad at school. Even Ashlee, who has been literally counting down the days until school was out, was struggling. She didn't cry or get upset. But she came to me at one point and told me how sad she was and how much she was going to miss Mrs Riches and Miss Matheson and that she didn't want a new teacher next year! (I know the feeling was mutual, as her teacher, Mrs. Riches, was really struggling saying goodbye to Ash yesterday as well. She has been an angel on earth to Ashlee this year. We will definitely miss her!)

I guess I should look at the positives in this. They all obviously love school. They all love to learn. And they have all been blessed with incredible and amazing teachers this year. Hopefully they will inherit a little bit of my sentimentality and a little of Rob's total lack of it. That should be a good balance.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

My last day with Sadie....

My little helper

What a crazy time of year it is! There are so many things going on right now with the end of school, soccer, dance recitals, scouts, piano recitals, family things, etc. etc. It is just a nutty time. And the day I have dreaded AND looked forward to for quite sometime, is hitting tomorrow...the last day of school. The kids are ecstatic and can't wait for summer break. They have all sorts of things planned and are really looking forward to it. I, on the other hand, have mixed feelings. I am so relieved to not have to get up so early (if Sadie will comply with that idea), not rush in the morning, not have endless amounts of homework, etc. But I am dreading the extra messes, having to entertain, etc. To make matters more challenging, I am now entering my last month of pregnancy and am struggling on a daily basis just to function, so adding 3 more kids to the mix all day is going to prove very difficult. All of these things have been racing through my mind for some time now.

What didn't occur to me until just this week, is that my daily "Sadie time" is coming to an end and will never happen again. Right now, after I drop the kids off at school, it is just me and my girl, Sadie. We do chores together, read, play, etc. and I have truly loved this past year having that daily time with just her and me. She is honestly such a joy in my life and I am so grateful for the blessing that she is to me and our family. McKell said to me a few days ago, "Mom, do you know what makes our family so great?" I asked her what. She said, "It's Sadie. She makes everyone happy and makes our family better!" I thought that was so sweet and so very true.

But after tomorrow, my "Sadie Days" are done. I will have all of the kids home for the summer and by the time they go back to school, we will have a new little brother joining Sadie and I during the day. It will never again just be me and her. It makes me very sad to see this time coming to an end. But I am grateful that, for the most part, I have treasured each day with her and tried to really enjoy her and not let her grow up too fast. I must admit that I am looking forward to Sadie having a little brother so close to her in age that she can play with. It is the main reason we had this baby so soon after Sadie - so they could be close in age and play together etc. Hopefully that will work out! LOL!

So tomorrow I will enjoy my last few hours with just me and my sweet Sadie Jayne. The laundry will have to wait, the chores will be there another day. Because tomorrow I will be too busy for all of that. Busy reading, playing, and snuggling with my little girl.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Why I do not understand the human race...the recital.

So as I posted, it was the girls' big dance recital last night. I already posted about the actual event and all that took place. Overall, we were so proud of the girls and can't wait to see part 2 of the recital next week. They are so excited to do their "Lollipop" dance.

But by last night, I was truly stunned and perplexed by the human race. It was one of the most odd days I had ever had in dealing with people. I felt like I was in an episode of the Twilight Zone or something. Here are a few examples of why I felt this way.

1. Rob, bless his heart, went straight to the Sandy Amphitheater right from work so he could get seats for us. We were told by our dance teacher that we couldn't save seats from the morning rehearsal, but never even thought there would be an issue if we came early that night. Rob got there at 5:20 and stood in line for 40 minutes waiting for the gates to open. He went in and found a good spot. There was 1 woman sitting on the row, and because he is a considerate person, he asked her if she needed any seats before he put his things down to save his seats for his family. This is where we entered the "cuckoo land". She quickly informed Rob that "we're not allowed to save seats." Rob was confused, but asked again if she needed any seats for her family (keeping in mind that people are now pouring in and taking any other good seats.) She again told him that she had been told by an announcement that there was no saving of seats and even though she had her whole family coming, she wasn't going to break the rules. Rob, who is a very logical thinker, couldn't even wrap his brain around this. He looked around at the countless number of people who had saved seats for their families, and then looked at her, and gave up. He started putting his blankets down for the 7 seats that we needed and this crazy woman went and "told" on him to one of the amphitheater staff. No, I am not kidding. (These staff people were not from our dance company - they were there from the amphitheater staffing. Our dance teacher is AWESOME and very laid back and logical.) The worker came to Rob and told him that it was true, it was policy, he wasn't allowed to save seats. Poor Rob was now dealing with 2 crazy women. He said to them, "Fine, I will take my stuff down as soon as you enforce this policy with every other person in here that is doing the exact same thing." Good for him! At this point he called me and told me to get there as quickly as possible. It went back and forth quite a few times until we showed up and could occupy our own seats. Thank heavens we got their before the crazy lady's family did...otherwise, it could have gotten ugly. When they did show up, it still wasn't pretty because "crazy lady" told them that we had stolen their seats. Oh well. Rob tried to be nice. So, that is incident number one. Oh yeah, I almost forgot. To make it more interesting, come to find out that "crazy lady" is actually one of my sister's best friends. I didn't even recognize her and Rob hadn't had a chance to tell me what had happened before the recital started. As we walked by her, she grabbed both mine and Rob's hands and said, "I think we should be best friends!" Yes, she was serious and yes, I was startled and afraid. Can you hear the Twilight Zone music yet?
2. This incident I will call "Don't mess with Mama Bear...especially a pregnant Mama Bear". Most of the girls sat with their individual classes. But because of a shortage of mom helpers in Ashlee and McKell's class, and because Ashlee is such a wildcard at things like this, I told their teacher that I would just have them sit with me. But when we first got there, WAY before the recital started, the girls wanted to say hello to the other girls in their class. No big deal right? Wrong. Next thing I know, some crochity old lady is grabbing Ashlee by the arm of one of the steps of the stage and is yelling at McKell. I ran down the steps as fast as my preggo body would let me and asked what was wrong. This awnry old woman was just all befuddled because my girls weren't sitting down with their class and according to her, "This one (Ashlee) is being VERY defiant. Yeah, lady, I would be defiant too if some crazy old bat was grabbing my arm and yelling at me! To make it even worse, she was trying to get them to sit in the 2 remaining seats that had a huge puddle of spilled coke underneath it! Hello! White ballet shoes and a puddle of Coke are not a good combination. This woman was seriously a crazy bat. She just kept yapping at me while I tried to get the girls back up to our seats. I finally turned to her and told her to relax and that I had it covered.
3. Not more than 20 minutes later, again before the concert began, Ashlee went back down to tell one of her friends something. Next thing I see, crazy old batty lady has her by the arm again and Ashlee finally pulls away and runs. At this point, the Pregnant Mama Bear emerges. I meet this woman and stop her in her tracks (I could honestly hear the music from the Wicked Witch of the West from Wizard of Oz playing at this point.) I said very bluntly to her, "Is there a problem!?" She, all flustered and befuddled again, says, "She needs to be with her class!" To which I very loudly replied, "Actually, she doesn't. What she needs is for you to leave her alone. I am her mother and you need to back off...now! She is supposed to be with me, and as I told you before, I am her mother and will handle it. But I am telling you right now....leave her alone!" She seemed very shocked and insulted. Oh well. Of course Ashlee had to get her two cents in and walks right up to her and says, "And by the way, you are a VERY grumpy lady!" Can't argue with that, right? My poor girls were traumatized by this whacky old woman. As McKell put it, very matter of factly, "Mom, I think that woman was just an awnry old hag. I hope that even though she is old, that she isn't a grandma because she is not nice!" Well said, McKell. Well said.
4. When the huge storm hit and we decided to get the girls under shelter, I quickly ran to the backstage entrance. I was met by a large group of wet, soggy parents who were not happy. I must have looked confused because one of the moms said, "They won't let us in to get our kids." What!? Again, this is not our dance group who was doing this, but the staff. They must have seen that I actually had my girls with me and let me in. What is up with that? How do you tell a group of parents that they can't be with their children in a very unsettling and scary situation!? As soon as the crazy old man at the door walked away, all of the parents poured in and found their kids. This was the final straw of the night. I just sat there, dripping, dazed, and confused at the human race.

There was a very odd vibe in the air last night. Everything was not aligned in the universe or something. I was waiting for Ashton Kucher to pop out and tell me I was being Punk'd...never happened.

Thank goodness today was more normal. All of the crazies must have gone back to their convention and I was left to what I consider my normal world.

2009 Dance Recital...part 1...the storm.

We had Ashlee & McKell's big end of the year dance recital last night. They have been working since January on their 2 numbers to perform. It was our first spring recital since starting the girls in dance and we were so excited. It was an EXHAUSTING day having to have the girls at the amphitheater in the morning for rehearsal, then back over to school, then back home to do hair, make up, dressed etc. I was ready to call it a day by 3:00!

Thankfully, Rob went straight to the amphitheater straight from work to get us seats. (I will address the drama of this situation later.)

Ashlee & McKell looked so beautiful in their dance costumes. Beautiful layered lavendar dresses with tiaras. I pulled out my old bendy curlers from my college days to get their hair extra curly and it looked darling.

They were both nervous but excited to dance. Ashlee was particularly nervous that she would be too "shy" to do it. But we talked about it a lot and assured her that she would do great! My parents even came which made it extra special. Sadie was a complete mess by the time it started. Poor thing was just exhausted after the day we had!

The concert started, everything was going okay. We even got a free air show. Because it is "Air Force Week" here in Utah, they were doing flyovers for the Bees game and we got to see it as well. It was pretty cool!!
But then the storm rolled in. We were in an outdoor amphitheater and were praying the whole time that the storm would wait until the show was over. Unfortunately, we only made it to about the 15th performance...out of 50. They took most of the dancers backstage where it was covered. Ashlee & McKell wanted to stay with us. First came the winds, then the lightning and thunder, and then the RAIN. Wow, what a downpour! It was like the heavens opened up and poured down on us. I was trying to keep the girls and Cayden dry, meanwhile, I was getting completely soaked. We finally decided to send my parents home, get the girls backstage, and get Sadie and Cayden in the car. It was quite a production trying to make sure we had everything...I still don't know if we got it all. And we all ran our separate ways...in this horrible awful storm.

The backstage of the theater was a sad sight. Lots of wet parents, frantic teachers and adults, and a lot of sad and crying little girls wanting to perform. It was heartbreaking. Fortunately, my girls got to perform 1 of their numbers right before the storm hit. They did great! One of the other dancers stepped on Ashlee's ballet shoe and it fell off. I was terrified of what she would do, but she quickly put it back on and went on with the dance. I was so proud. McKell looked so beautiful and graceful and really knew all of the dance. Ashlee didn't know most of it, or was distracted by everything that was going on, but she did it. If you would have told me a few years ago that my Ashlee would be dancing in a dance recital, I would have told you that you were nuts. We were very proud of our girls.

So, the recital was finally called off. I took my two wet, sad, and cold little girls home. We still stopped for ice cream which seemed to help. The recital is rescheduled for next Tuesday. Please pray for good weather!
I am so happy that I was able to get these beautiful pictures of the girls before the recital. They both looked so beautiful and were so thrilled to be all dressed up in their costumes.