His wife AND his girlfriend...

So, I just had to jot this one down. I just returned from an adventurous trip to Costco with my 4 kids in tow. It looks more like a florist shop than Costco today with Valentine's tomorrow. There are bouquets of flowers everywhere and it seems everyone is buying some. So as we sat and ate our frozen yogurt before leaving, the kids observed how many people were leaving with flowers. They said that we should go buy flowers for Dad for Valentines Day. I explained that Dad, like most men, wasn't a big fan of flowers on Valentines Day. I pointed out to them that most of the people leaving with flowers were men, buying them for their wives. They thought it was cool seeing the different colors, bouquets, etc. Then a man came walking by with two huge bouquets. McKell says to the other kids, rather non chalantly, "Hmmm...must be for his wife AND his girlfriend." I about spit chocolate yogurt out my nose as I watched the other 2 just kind of nod their heads in agreement. I said, "Uh, no. Hello!" They were very perplexed and seemed confused as to why that assessment wasn't okay. I explained to them that it was never good for a man to have a wife AND a girlfriend, to which they all said, "Why?" (At this point, I am speechless and thinking I very well may have failed my children as a mother! How could they not know this instinctively?) I explained that when a man and a woman get married, that they are only supposed to love each other, not other men or women. Before I really thought about it, I blurted out, "Would you guys like it if Daddy had a girlfriend?" to which they all, in unison and with eyes as bright as Christmas morning, shouted, "YES!" (Again, I am thinking I have failed at my job as a mother....not only do they not have basic morals, they now want a second mother!) They thought this whole thing was quite comical. I told them, "Fine, you want a new Mommy? You've got it! I'll let Daddy know that he should start looking for a new girlfriend who can be your new mommy." That seemed to jar them a bit. Then, the little darlings expressed to me that they didn't want a NEW mommy, they just thought it would be cool to have a second mommy. Cayden could tell I wasn't convinced and said, "Mom, we just thought it would be cool for Daddy to have a girlfriend that could come to our house and clean and cook and do all the work so you could just relax and be our mom and play." Hmm...now, THAT is something worth thinking about. I called Rob immediately and proposed it. He now thinks I am more insane than before. I just think he doesn't want to have to buy Valentines flowers for his wife AND his girlfriend.